2020 and Life is good FINALLY

 So funny thing to blog/journal about happened today, when I had it in my head that I had Garcia at 10am and even like a dork I have it on every calendar I own that it clearly is at 2pm after my functional team meeting with Andy.  Nichole was kind enough to remind me even though I scared her a tiny bit that my appointment is at 2pm and we both giggled about it.  I'm still shaking my head and laughing on the inside.  And now I can get the kitchen cleaned, laundry started, dogs walked, etc.  It was good to see CS and Xavier yesterday but dang both of those guys are hard and frustrating but I hope I'm doing a good job for them.  Emily says I am and so does Erin and Brandi but I guess it takes time for it to show with the kids.  I know I'm being a good example for them and being a positive model for them both and just have to be patient and wait for the work to show up when they mature up a little bit.  I haven't felt any anxiety lately which is a great feeling but then aga

Well come to find out my past, my childhood wasn't perfect but ya know what, it made me the strong mofo that I came to be now.  Some of my trauma comes from the Battle of Flowers sniper event, and then also from the event of us almost getting washed away in the flash flood around this time of year in the boat, the blue impala.  The anxiety has been at bay since I came to that realization but at the same time, Mom and Dad did the best that they could even with Dad's errors he still did what he could for us and Mom of course worked his fingers to the bone to make sure we were fed, clothed and housed.  She protected us when the sniper opened up at the Battle of Flowers parade as did Frank my brother because he knew that is what he was told to do by Mom.  I shared with him my appreciation for everything that he did for me through our childhood and protecting me through our growing up years and taking care of me when Mom and Dad had to work hard to provide for us.  I'm glad noth

So 2023 ended with some tough times due to a relapse with everything that I had going on including the massive oral surgery thing and making food for the family that I think screwed with my head and then getting use to them and all that just added to the anxiety and depression and then trying to put out that fire again with Bud Lights like a dummy.  I know better than that and then of course I hurt my foot on Christmas Eve and walk on it for two days even after making lots of food for family and friends and limping through all of it.  Finally had to give in and go to urgent care the day after Christmas and get it checked out.  They of course x-rayed the foot and before radiology could even read the x-rays, the NP could already tell that there was a darn fracture on the first metatarsal and referred us to the KC Orthopedic Alliance and then I got hooked up with Kniedel who ordered a ct scan and then a visit with him in person where  we discussed the results and he shared that I didn’t j