Happy Monday and GLAD
So today was a learning day and realization of a lot of things including the fact that I was slowly gradually becoming something that I hated from CB HRB which was excessive drinking. Something that caused her to disconnect and become the toxic person was the one thing that I was fucking becoming myself and basically creating within this life with EMM. So WTF!! Time to put a stop to that crap in a quick f'king dang hurry. Self medicating with food is something that I did back in San Diego and earlier here in KC. I in turn create the self medicating with the alcohol as a follow up to avoiding the food as a security blanket. But the question remains WHY? I'm very aware I'm in a safe place and comfortable with life with EMM, so why would I need to feel insecure for anything? Why would I need self medicating to recover or to feel safe or secure? I'm sure some goals and focused thinking and small goals and celebrating each accomplishment (one week at a time) would be th