Lessons Learned from Co-Dependency

 So another great session with Katy Roberts, and comes another great blog post. Learned and of course shared a lot with her from not just the weekend but how things have been going over the last few weeks since we last met.  Included in conversation were the highlights from Judy and I cranking out the MCM a few weeks ago and the Blessing of how that turned into one woman doing her solo marathon and that crazy idea, to it becoming a full blown family event.  But also just the straight up admission that the binge drinking happened this past weekend.  She asked and I of course was honest that there was some binge drinking going on this weekend. So I started explaining to Katy, the bingeing commenced with the way that I heard Logan talk to her at various times during the weekend.  Not sure what caused it Friday evening for sure, but definitely having them here for the weekend and then the way he talked to her on Sunday during the game, "Hey, are you coming or not?" or replying to her with "what?!" with a certain tone in his voice.  So in watching that, it creates other triggers that include "absolute" words such as Never, Always, Nobody, or stuff like she only comes to see me if I pay for it.  So of course those type of absolute words are damming and not true only unsafe assumptions. And of course what that comes from is of course, the infamous trials of what I've experienced not just with my own co-dependence from childhood plus with times with Judy and the other two morons. So instead of recycling those triggered feelings I should be learning from them and using them as learning and teaching tools to share with Samantha as its meant to be a learning tool and she can use that to make choices or address them as she sees necessary.  The challenging part of that would be the choice of wording or how to address it where it doesn't come across as directed at her or him but just shared in general terms. Its totally not about Logan or Samantha, but rather the behavior and it toxicity within a relationship and how if you address it early on, it doesn't manifest itself into something quite bigger than it has to be.